It’s real wrath of god weather outside… the skies have opened up and the thunder and lightning are seemingly non-stop. Our sons have just left for the night. We turn the lights off in our room and, through the almost floor to ceiling windows, we watch nature’s light show. We’re both in deep thought but we know what we’re both thinking. Tomorrow.
We start our real path to the stem cell transplant tomorrow. Although Rich is still on two of the four antibiotics and is being closely monitored, his counts are good and his strength is returning… Which means the wizards of oncology and stem cells have decided that we will stay three more days in the hospital but will be transferring to the oncology floor to start RICE chemo. So come morning, we’ll be moving to a new room on a new floor, a new protocol, and, for the next three days, a new routine.
Three days.
In reality, everything going forward is a new routine. O Brave New World!
For all our frustration, now that we’ve got what we wanted, we’re stuck with… what we wanted.
We’re thankful that the counts are good, the infection is fading, the antibiotics are working and his strength is returning. We’re thankful that we’re in a place where we can start what needed to be started two days ago and that little time was lost.
But OH! It’s tomorrow!
Maybe it comes from the lack of outside air, but our brains are having difficulty processing that one little thing….
Tomorrow.
We’re prepared… enough clothes for both of us, toiletries, our bag of chemo tricks, our scrabble game, our photos and talismans are all with us.
So now we wonder.
Tomorrow.
Tomorrow? Soon enough that will be yesterday. And we will have gotten everything we wished for!
Use What Exists 